Concentric Counselling
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welcome to the concentric journal

 
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Fat Bubble: Bethany Rutter
Fat Bubble: Bethany Rutter
Why Bingeing is Only Half the Story
Why Bingeing is Only Half the Story

When people come to Concentric Counselling with a history of bingeing, they are often surprised that one of the first things I ask them is how often they restrict their food intake. To them, they are coming because the issue is bingeing. But what continues to reveal itself in the therapy room is that for many people that struggle with bingeing these episodes punctuate long periods of restriction.

The Heart of Body Collaboration - Intentions and Inspirations
The Heart of Body Collaboration - Intentions and Inspirations

Let me share with you some more details of the exciting model that I’ve been developing. Called Body Collaboration, it has emerged from my practice over the last ten years, a compassionate response to clients sharing a persistent issue - ‘I’m trying to hate myself into being ok with myself’. Body Collaboration is a pushback to a kyriarchal culture that teaches us to admonish ourselves rather than accept ourselves. It’s a radical practice of gathering in the most abandoned parts of ourselves, and offering them healing. And it’s a lovesong to what I think is the most powerful thing on Earth – partnership, collaboration, working together for the good of the all.

Sitting in the corridor - why it's a necessary part of recovery
Sitting in the corridor - why it's a necessary part of recovery

I often meet clients when they're in a particular spot... they’ve turned their back on intentional weight loss, knowing that going back into that way of life will only cause harm and open them up to risk. At the same time, they don't know how to transition into a space of body acceptance, knowing that there will also be loss in that decision.

From apology to entitlement - battling body assumptions
From apology to entitlement - battling body assumptions

In my corner of the world, we talk a lot about anti-fat bias or fatphobia and, more broadly, how it is to live in a body that is marginalised by dominant culture – through race, gender and sex, body size or shape, or disability.

Sometimes our conversations about anti-fat bias can take on a very theoretical and abstract form – as a systemic issue, of course we often look at it through a wide-angle lens. More recently, though, I’ve been thinking more and more of the individual impact of anti-fat bias – what it really means to live in a fatphobic culture.

Sensory Five - safety at your fingertips
Sensory Five - safety at your fingertips

Overwhelm and burnout don’t just happen in Covid times – these are themes I’ve been working for since the very beginning of my counselling career. It’s when our nervous system becomes overloaded, and we really struggle to regulate ourselves; feeling either anxious and agitated, or zoned out and flat.

Introducing A Modern Practice - Let Me Tell You More
Introducing A Modern Practice - Let Me Tell You More

For those of you who follow me on Instagram or subscribe to my mailing list you will know that I have been building towards a space for therapists to come together and connect. I’m so happy today to be able to outline this a little more, and introduce this idea to you.

Lessons from the ebb - how to get through when life draws back
Lessons from the ebb - how to get through when life draws back

We're in an ebb season, collectively, I think. And we're not encouraged to think about this at all. The effects of the pandemic, here in the UK, have been upon us for eleven months. And what’s been so surprising is how little accommodation we will often make for this. We’re living in a global tragedy – a collective trauma. Life has, necessarily, had to recede. We have had to lean hard on our internal resources – our patience, our hope, our tenacity. Understandably, we’re feeling a little depleted.

Embracing a non-diet new year - setting body positive resolutions 
Embracing a non-diet new year - setting body positive resolutions 

The relentless treadmill of diet resolutions is about to crank itself up again, at the start of the new year. After all the festive food adverts, Boxing Day onwards will see the focus shift instead to weight loss programmes, diet foods and new ‘healthy eating’ cookbooks, sold to you by slim people. It is a predictable, exhausting cycle, which perpetuates unhealthy ‘all or nothing’ thinking, and punishing and unsustainable restriction.

A beginner’s guide to developing body acceptance
A beginner’s guide to developing body acceptance

And so begins December, the month where dominant culture tends to deep-slide into a clarion call for ‘indulgence’ before, as regular as clockwork, the adverts and articles that promise ‘new year, new you’. Christmas is an exaggerated example of the pendulum swing that diet culture encourages; ricocheting between too much and not enough – all governed by a deep fear that we ourselves are not enough.

Three ways in which passion can support our mental health #mhaw17

Yesterday, in acknowledgment of Mental Health Awareness Week, I looked to Maya Angelou when considering how we can survive instead of thrive. Over the rest of this week, I thought I would focus on the components of this wonderful quote, to consider how we enjoy a richer, more enjoyable life. Today, I'm considering how passion can help us thrive.

“My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive, and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humour, and some style.”
— Dr Maya Angelou

Passion gives us a sense of purpose

Generally, when we’re passionate about something, we find it easier to engage with the task. Cultivating passions, for activities, pastimes and hobbies, gives meaning to our days, when we are feeling low in motivation or energy.

Passion provides consistency

Passion is easy to turn into a habit; when we enjoy doing something, we want to do it more. Forming positive habits can help regulate our mental wellbeing by providing structure and routine to our time, which can be especially useful when we’re feeling mentally or emotionally ‘adrift’. Committing to our passion can be used as an anchor when we’re feeling lost, restless or low.

Passion provides an opportunity for mindfulness

Doing something we love allows us to really be in the moment. Anxiety, depression and stress often try to distract us from fully appreciating what it is that we are doing; doing something that we love improves the odds of us really committing to fully appreciating the task at hand. Studies have shown again and again how incorporating mindfulness into our lives help us to feel more satisfied and fulfilled.

A tip to harness your passion to improve your mental health

We all go through energy peaks and troughs during the day and, when our mental health is suffering and we’re feeling low or overwhelmed, it can be difficult to find the motivation or energy to do all the things we need to do. Consider keeping an ‘energy journal’ for a few weeks - make a note of times during the day when you had more energy and times when you had less, and look to see if any patterns form. Then write a list of ‘have to dos’, ‘hate to dos’ and ‘love to dos’, and try to arrange your day to work for you. Take advantage of peak energy times and try and pile all the ‘have to dos’ and ‘hate to dos’ into those times; your good energy levels will see you through tasks for which you don’t particularly care. And, in the times when your mood or energy level dips down, treat yourself to some ‘love to do’ task - harness your passion to give you an energy boost and lift your mood.

If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this post, and think that counselling would help, do please contact me. For more details, or to arrange an initial consultation, call me on 07419 190930 or hello@concentriccounselling.com.

Mental health, PassionVicky Bellmanwellbeing, mental health, mental health awareness week, mhaw17, mental health foundation, passion, maya angelou